In the beginning single life was a whole lot of fun. After that first trip to Montreal I felt like I was reborn. The dating world was all new to me and I couldn’t wait to have fun with it. The weekend after we came back from Montreal, we went to a couple bars then ended our night at a lounge in Manhattan that KB would always go to. After we got our drinks I noticed this really attractive guy standing by the bar with a few people. I heard him speak French and the first thought that came to me was that this guy must be from Montreal. Why Montreal and not France? Well, we did just get back from Montreal and for all I knew every attractive guy was from Montreal. Anyway, I immediately tell KB my thoughts and as I am he leans over to me and introduces himself as Francois. We start talking and low and behold, Francois is from the land of the charming and beautiful…Montreal!! He was born and raised in Montreal, but later his family moved to LA (the land of the superficial). While we were talking he tells me that he is a drummer touring with his band and they had just finished playing a venue nearby. I never heard of his band but we did have musical interests in common along with many other things. One of the first things I usually notice about a guy is his clothing and Francois was very well dressed with his vintage oxford shoes. Francois was about 6’ and his face structure and eyes reminded me of Nicolas Cage circa 1987 with better teeth and way better facial hair.
We talked for awhile before the rest of his band came over and introduced themselves, then they invited us to come with them to the next location. We walked over to the next spot which was a nice little lounge with a couch to the side near the entrance. Francois and I sat down and talked the entire time about mostly music and some of our other interests mixed in. He got more and more attractive the more we talked, but was super shy. KB kept walking past us mouthing “what’s taking so long?” We talk for a bit more before telling him that it’s getting late and that we have to go. We exchange numbers and then he asks if he can have a kiss on the cheek. I go to kiss him on the cheek and he moves his face so that he could get a real kiss and proceeds to tell me that he tricked me. Meanwhile, I say “haha, you got me”, but what I’m really thinking is “whatever, took ya long enough. Now shut up and kiss me!” He was a great kisser and I really didn’t want to leave him just yet, but it was getting late. The next day he texts me how it was nice to meet me and he is looking forward to come visit NYC again so that we can see each other. I found out soon after that Francois was very young, possibly in his early 20s. We never did see each other again, but soon after our encounter, his band got pretty popular. So popular that he’s been on MTV quite a bit, which was weird to see. I congratulated him the other day via text after seeing that. Francois will be missed.
A week after I cut things off with “No More Mr. Nice Guy”, I was walking my dog and this character of a guy approaches me asking if I am a runner. I’m thrown off a bit because in my neighborhood, men are too scared to approach woman which is sometimes a good thing since most aren’t all that attractive anyway. This guy was very fit, had a retro/European look and made being completely bald very sexy. We talk on the corner for quite awhile before asking him what he does for a living. He tells me he’s a musician and after he says that, I really wanted to roll my eyes and walk away. He then tells me that he’s the drummer of a very popular musician, which I will not mention her real name but will call her Selina Spectra (you’ll never know who it is now). We’ll even change his name to Rave. The crazy thing is that earlier that day I was on Youtube and was watching some of her videos and posted one of my favorite songs from her (which is about fidelity) on my Facebook page. We then became FB friends and would communicate through that until a few weeks later he asked me to hangout. We met up at one of my favorite neighborhood bars. We ended up leaving and walking around the neighborhood. We must have walked and talked for hours before he walked me home and kissed me goodnight at my door. I can say that I have kissed quite a few men in my day, but have had little to no chemistry with most. When I kissed Rave, we definitely had chemistry. This I know since the hairs on the back of my neck shot right up. Rave was an amazing kisser and I really couldn’t wait to hangout with him again.
Our sporadic encounters, or what one may call a “date”, were never boring and definitely not predictable. On one of our “dates”, Rave bought a bottle of wine and we decided to go sit by the waterfront and enjoy the beautiful skyline of lower Manhattan. Sounds pretty romantic right? Well, would have been if we remembered to bring a bottle opener. My brilliant idea was to use a key to push the cork down. We did that a few times until my key broke, but we were getting close so we used another key. When I finally heard some air come through, I grabbed the bottle from him and pushed real hard until the wine splashed all over me. After trying to clean the red wine stains from my shirt and pants, we were finally able to enjoy our corky bottle of Merlot. We enjoyed about a glass and a half until it started pouring really hard. Luckily, Rave drove there so we ran to the car and continued the rest of the date soaked and with wine stains in the car for a little while until he drove me home and we called it a night. Another day, Rave calls me up to go to a café not too far from where his apt is. As I am walking to his apt, I see him fly around the corner with his car, suddenly comes to a stop next to me and screams “get in!” He then flies off down the street before saying “I totally forgot I had a court date for a parking ticket! You don’t mind coming right?” I didn’t really have a chance to say no since by the time I was about to answer, we were pretty much almost there considering how fast he was going. When we get to the court room, there seemed to be a lot of cases and most were ahead of Rave’s case. I really wanted to shoot myself! I turned the sound off from my phone before deciding to play a game, didn’t realize that the volume key was only for the ringer. The loudest most obnoxious song started blasting from my phone and I couldn’t seem to turn my phone off. Every time I tried, the song got louder and louder. The security guard asks for my phone and tries to turn it off but had no luck. Then the judge takes the phone and tries to turn it off and he could not figure it out either. They proceeded to throw me out of the court room so for the rest of our “date”, I had to wait outside.
These encounters continued for months and for some odd reason, I get a kick out of it. Rave is not the person that I see myself being with for the long run, he has an ADD personality, wears the tightest briefs I’ve ever seen in my life, and I’m pretty sure everyone he knows has seen him naked at one point or another. Yet, I can’t get enough of it. I am so entertained by him. I’ve been analyzing our relationship since we’ve met wondering why the hell I put myself through that. When we first met, it was nice to just have fun and not have to worry about where things were going. Now, I realize that I miss being in a relationship and have had all the “fun” I can take. As I look even deeper into why I push the Romeos away and give my time to the flakes, I realize it’s because I know what to expect from the flakes. It’s a hard thing to deal with when you do meet a “nice” guy and expect him not to do you wrong, then turns into a big disappointment which ends in a broken heart. A flake never lets you down because your expectations of them are low to begin with. They don’t hide who they are and you know what to expect. I’ve learned a lot the past year and a half about relationships and about myself. Life has given me experiences that I like to think of as tests. Have a passed all of them? Absolutely not, but I can definitely say I have learned from them and will continue to do so.
